For Proust, it was a madeleine which brought his memories flooding in. For me, it was driving past the strip center where I took dance lessons every week from Mrs. Duggins. The Tastee Freez we would pop into for ice cream after class has a different name but it still stands. Memories are odd. What imprints deeply on us is so often the mundane and ordinary moments that make up our lives. We think we will remember the big holidays and events, but my memories are filled with soft serve ice cream and a dance teacher who was forever challenged by my tendency to adlib choreography at will.
Growing up, my parents best friends Harry and Sarah were always a part of our lives. My dad and Harry would fish and play poker together. Mom and Sarah played tennis every week and volunteered together at church. Aunt Sarah and Uncle Harry were very much a part of our family and I can’t remember a time before them for they were friends long before I was even born.
Dad and Harry have been gone for several years now. Mom and Sarah have stayed in touch and speak frequently, but Mom in Texas is finding her mobility challenged these days. Aunt Sarah is now legally blind and unable to drive or skydive anymore. (Seriously, she was an avid sky diver. She is still the coolest). Its becoming increasingly difficult for each of them to travel these days. They still have the urge but circumstances make it a bit more difficult so despite declarations of ‘we need to get together soon’, years have passed since they’ve been able to see each other.
The one thing I wanted while spending time in Cocoa was to get my mom to fly out and spend time with Sarah. Since I would be here and able to Drive the Miss Daisy’s, I managed to convince my mom to come out. I am so grateful that she and Sarah got to see each other again and I loved seeing that Sarah is still the plucky go getter she always has been. Somethings change, yet somethings remain the same. My mom and Sarah’s abiding friendship is perpetual, and it makes my heart happy to know that there are some constants in the universe.
We drove down the dead end street where we lived. As a kid, it felt like I lived in an enchanted world. Our street was protected on one side by a tall brick wall sheltering our little kingdom on one side, the Indian river on the other. Driving now I realized what a small street it is, though in my memory it was a long road full of places or wonder. There is the Colonel’s house who stood next door to us seperating us from my friend Lynn’s house. The slope at the top of the street seemed mountainous as a child and riding down it on our bikes felt like a daredevil move. In reality, its a very gentle slope. Our house is no longer recognizable. The once large lot now engulfed with a rather architecturally unsympathetic addition that devoured the Colonial style ranch we lived in. The treehouse built by my dad and uncles is long gone. The thickly wooded lot next door that provided hours of ‘jungle exploration’ has been cleared and a McMansion now resides there.
There are some things that are better to remember as they were and I think idyllic childhood homes are one. As much as I loved indulging in a bit of nostalgia in Melbourne, I am choosing to remember North Sylvan Lane as it exists in my memories. I guess this means I am officially an old person. The whole experience of checking out our old street was an exercise in ‘back in my day’. I kind of wish I hadn’t gone. Seeing Sarah however, was amazing. I adored seeing her and my mom just enjoying each other”s company. That’s the best part of my trip back to Melbourne, seeing Sarah again as its been far too many years. I think that is the lesson here. Its the people we love and the memories that we’ve shared that matter. Material things are just material things. A house is just a building, its the memories that they hold that have importance.
I had to see Sarah and my Mom and I felt compelled to visit Melbourne, a place I’ve not been back to for over 40 years. That itch had been scratched and it was time to sail North to Norfolk, Va. on our way to Nova Scotia but that is a tale for next time…